Volkanenborg

[Sareth]

For musical instruments, those things were some of the strangest looking things I had ever seen. I couldn't even come close to figuring out how in the world anyone would have come up with the idea those things were even usable, let alone musical. But, then, supposedly the Bagpipes were a dwarvish invention, so these fellows might actually be on to something.

Ignoring the itching on the back of my neck that meant that the elf was staring at me again (okay... the itching in my ass... which was beginning to make me feel the tiniest bit awkward. Usually I worried about being stabbed in the *back*) I turned to another case. This one had a number of decorative cylinders sitting there, labeled as being ink grinders. A sign next to them stated that it appeared, based off the presence of ash inside, that the dwarves would grind charcoal into ink in an emergency. No writing based on charcoal was known to have survived from that time, however, so it was doubtful that the dwarves allowed themselves to be caught without ink very often.

I turned to our guide. "So, you say these are from the Lost Mine? That sounds quite fascinating. Where do you think the mine is?" I smiled my most charming I'm-not-a-killer-worried-about-being-violated-by-an-elf smile to the man for about three seconds, before turning enough to look at the elf out of the corner of my eye.

Yep... He was staring at my ass. What was it about asses all of a sudden?

[AdamZero]

Shit. Elf boy was back on his feet... sorta. He was focused on Jamies ass. I remembered one of the "Ladies' ladies" at the brothel explaining her 'Universal Theory of Posterior Romance'. Basically, it boiled down to the fact that because everyone, and just about everything, worth having sex with had a rear end, asses themselves were the most desirable portion of the anatomy in whatever species you were hoping to shag with.

"In short." She had said. "Everyone and everything is an Ass man." I distinctly remember my face and palm meeting to confer this thought, my fingers attending to an itch in my eyebrow region at the same time.

She may be on to something with that though. Considering the elf, apparent interest in Jamie, at a distinct part of the anatomy of aforementioned gunner. The new elf was surprising... naturalistic, with his amorous nature, and to counter this, and possibly dissuade him from bothering us any further, I chose a rather basic form of dissuasion.

I wrapped my arm around Jamie's waist and, glaring at the elf, muttered. "MINE."

Basically I claimed the smooth little death machine as my own. I gave Jamie a Not-trying-to-be-an-ass-Roll-with-it look, hoping that some prior experience would allow my meaning to be understood.

[Sareth]

Feeling Marcus' hand on my hip, his arm around my waist, tugging me slightly in against him, I smiled, and gave the elf a wink. I figured Marcus was just trying to help... and I'd just kill Marcus later. After all, he still owed me a steak.

I returned to the dwarf freak, wondering if just maybe I might get a hint of something worth checking out about the Lost Veracian Mine. Was it at the theme park? And if so, what would I need to do to find something worht a bundle?

[Graybeard]

Reverend Hammersmith turned to a case marked "Artifacts of unknown function." There was a small, flat rectangular box with four feet on one large side and tiny transparent pieces set into one of the edges. Another Artifact looked like a container of some kind, made of a clear material and about 8" by 6" by 2:, with a metallic structure attached to one long, narrow side and a U-shaped pipe protruding from it. There were several Artifacts of broadly cylindrical shape. All had the same kind of rope or wire dangling from one surface or another.

"We believe these ropes to be ceremonial in nature," Hammersmith said when someone inquired. "They serve to connect the Artifact symbolically to the Divine Essence, in ways that we cannot understand without the wisdom of the Dwarves. When they Return, they will no doubt enlighten us."

A pre-teenaged-looking boy had wandered in off the street and chose this moment to interrupt. "Yeah, but where's the good stuff? You know, the rockets, bombs, death rays? The important things?" Hammersmith glared at him and walked to the next case...

[AdamZero]

I could feel a subtle bloodlust building in Jamie, and leaned close. "Two steak dinners, all trimmings on both, good ale, naughty show aaaand..." I tried to think of something else to bribe away the anger, no matter how miniscule it might be, but I realized my funds were going to be stretched a bit at that point. "....maybe a nice long walk somewhere? somewhere not too secluded." I shot a glance back at the more serious elf, who was on his feet and apparently being bombarded by inquiries from the woman who had called Jamie Jasmine. Odd, but convenient.

At the young man's inquiry I was tempted to point upwards at the top floor, but I chose my words to flatter the Reverend. "I'm sure the Dwarves foresaw enough of mankind's natural violence to know that the tools of war that they might bestow would best be saved for their arrival, so that those they themselves may chose who is most worthy of their inflictors of holy wrath and justice."

I exhaled. by the elven god of death that was a mouthful. I mostly hack and slapped some crap I heard from a cleric of Luminosita. Lots of fancy dialogue, and a lot of direct liable that the elves were a bunch of harlots, rapists, and heretics.

Not so bad as the stuff I grew up with, which denied the Elves existence all together.

[Graybeard]

"And finally, the pièce de résistance," Reverend Hammersmith said as the guns-and-bombs kid lost interest and wandered out. He pulled aside a curtain with an overly dramatic flourish to reveal the Artifact behind it.

It wasn't in prime condition, having lost some luster under the weight of the ages, but it was still impressive. A table about six feet long and three feet wide perched atop four spindly legs, one of which was obviously a reconstruction made of more modern metal. The table itself looked to be maybe a foot thick and was surfaced with a transparent material of some kind. Attached to the table at one end (and sporting the ubiquitous rope) was another sheet-like component, as wide as the table and standing vertically about five feet tall. A short rod-like handle, no more than six inches long, protruded from the other end.

But what made this Artifact so awe-inspiring were the decorations protected by the glassy material on its top. Time had weathered all of the paint off the unprotected exterior surfaces, but the transparent lid, whatever it was, had done its job well. Recessed about three inches below it, the metallic surface of the table bore incredibly elaborate paintings of mythical monsters in menacing poses. A number of raised, plateau-like structures protruded from the main surface, generally separating the monsters from each other. There were several stylized representations of Anuban swamp beasts, and a snarling, overwrought cave bear was prominent in the center of the display. Most of the depicted monsters, however, were of no type known to modern man (or elf).

"An extraordinary piece," Hammersmith said. "There are no others like it in the world that we know of. We are fairly sure it was used for religious rites, although we can only speculate as to what they were. If you look carefully, you might note that the surface of the main table slopes down slightly from that end." He indicated the tall vertical attachment. "And if you use your imagination, you might think that there is a path through the monsters leading from that end down to this other one, where presumably the supplicants worshiped. The whole tableau might represent the travels of a pilgrim through the terrors of the world, to reach a blissful resting place below ground at this end. Careful analysis has detected the residues of some kinds of liquids on the table top at this end. Some appear to have been dried beer or mead, and we have no idea what the others are, but they're presumably sacrifices of some manner. This is one of the items that leads us to believe that the Dwarven heaven is subterranean rather than in the sky, as in that silly religion the elves have, and the even sillier one -- forgive my bluntness -- that the Church of Luminosita lays down.

"The greatest minds of the church have pored over this Artifact without penetrating its secrets. We still have no idea exactly how the Dwarves used it. However, we are confident that they will tell us -- when they return to save us from ourselves."

[Drannin]

(OOC: Sareth, I'm borrowing Jamie's mother here, and guessing at her appearance. Let me know if I get something wrong.)

Prick-tease.

So blondie had just been yanking him around. Well, fine. Selvay turned to go find some other prospective genitals when a set materialized in front of him, complete with attached female.

"Excuse me... but are you an elf?" Blonde. Blue eyes. Mature, but but still attractive. Strong features practically begging for a romp in the hay. Oh, yeah. He was so there. A dazzling smile lit up Selvay's features, and actually illuminating the room a tad. The effect was enough to make the woman blush.

"Why yes, you gorgeous young thing. My name's Selvay, and I certainly hope that yours is 'available.'" From any other set of lips, this would have brought a groan from anyone in earshit. From Selvay, it pretty much sealed the deal.

"Er, actually, I was just curious. You know, where you're from, what you've seen. Your experiences. Why you dress like that. What brings you here..."

"My penis size."

"Your penis...wha?!" SHe was hot when she blushed!

"Actually, I am VERY experienced, and willing to share. IF you're interested." The dazzling smile lit up the room again as Selvay successfully picked up the mother of an angry killing machine.

[Sareth]

[OOC: Nope, you got the description pretty down pat]

I chuckled, looking at the odd structure before me with a smile and acted like I was amused. In truth, I was frustrated. I had learned nothing whatsoever about the location of the mine. Darn priest. Darn relics. Darn... Well, at least I'd been promised two steak dinners out of the deal, even if I had been getting oggled like I was the steak...

I fought down my irritation, still pretending to hang on Marcus' arm like a devoted spouse. I reached over to pat his hand, just as I turned about to find that my mother had followed us in, and was now apparently being dazzled by my oggler. My hand automatically clenched in anger, the fact that it was basically holding Marcus' hand not withstanding.

"MOTHER!"

The moment it left my mouth, I realized I'd blown it, big time. My hand shot to my mouth, my eyes grew large...

And I turned and bolted.

[AdamZero]

As Jamie took off, my brain went into a freeze frame mode, I followed in chase, doing my best to keep from losing sight. I moved without thought, acting without actually thinking. Dodging and moving without real thought.

Priests' exit.

Back room.

Table.

Service door.

Alley.

Box.

Alley, smaller.

Four breasted viking blacksmithess.

Empty street, bad condition.

"STOP!" I finally yelled as I yanked Jamie to a standstill. My hands caught cloth and pulled my exhasperated quarry into my embrace. Boris chuckled. "Okay... chill...DON'T MOVE. Chill... relax..." I eased so I could look Jamie in the face, turning to check I saw the blacksmithess holding a very heavy looking hammer. I paled and looked back at Jamie, head fallen to the ground. I squated, sorta, so I could look up into those eyes that had looked at doom and not known fear and now were filled with it. Fear that is.

"Okay...I won' ask anything about your mum. Not my place. Bu' please... relax... breathe... and try not to die. That'd be a real shitter on a day like this."

[Sareth]

[OOC: AdamZero... I'm a bit lost as to what happened in your latest post. Could you clarify for me? Thanks.]